Let Me Tell You About Kids Without Control


I remember when one of my children was around age 3 we had one of those nights where you haven’t done the grocery shopping and you just couldn’t be bothered so you end up getting takeaway. We presented her with her nuggets and chips, only for her to look at it and say, ‘No thanks, I’ll have a salad’.

What the?

So we ate our plates of unhealthiness while she dug into a bowl of cucumber and capsicum, her favourites.

Although my children making sensible choices is not a rarity, it still surprises me. The idea that without rules and limits children will be irresponsible and unhealthy is so pervasive.

It is generally believed that children require adult control and micromanagement, and without it there would be dire consequences. Control is justified as for children’s own good.

But control is not the solution, it is the problem.

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About S. R. Zelenz 119 Articles
S.R. Zelenz has worked in education for 20 years. Working with students from all walks of life, cultures, races, and social diversity, Zelenz’s research in Educational Leadership led to finding a better way to approach learning for students with trauma histories. Many were juvenile offenders, gang members, diagnosed with varying behavioral disorders, or had family histories of violence, murder, or narcissistic parenting. This research could not be effectively accomplished without further understanding: how epigenetic trauma inheritance may be impacting these students; how brain development from trauma may be impacting their behavioral and emotional development; as well as deep understanding of psychology and its varying classifications for behavioral and personality disorders. The goal is to find solutions for changing the conversation and making a real difference for these students. She has also worked with nonprofits of varying focus areas for the last 25 years. Her undergraduate degree in Arts Administration and Music prepared her for managing nonprofits of any size as well as procuring funding so that they can achieve their goals. Pairing her nonprofit background with her education background, she has been able to make a difference for over 200 nonprofits worldwide, written curriculum for schools across the globe, and assisted many arts organizations through performance and management.